Happy...Fifth... of July?

All right, all right, I know it's a day late but you have to watch this. Now. Many times. Until it is stuck in your head. Then follow the advice at the end, maybe. Stop reading this and watch it. Now. Did you watch it? Good. Now you may leave. Nothing more to see here.

Then Buffy Staked Edward.The End.Hooray.

I must admit, for a while, I was caught up in the "Twilight fever". I liked Edward because, unlike most stupid teen heartthrobs, he wasn't shallow. So I wasn't happy when the movie came out, and Twilight became "Forks Washington, 98331" and Edward became a stupid, shallow heartthrob. In addition, the acting was wooden, the makeup horrible, and the stunts/special effects laughable. So for all of us that hated the movie, Edward finally gets his comeuppance.

Enjoy!

The one thing that I want to know though, is when does Bella get her turn? Her acting was horrible, worse than Edward's.

And to all the Twilight fans who proclaim "OMG! He is sooooooooo hot!" I now reply "OMG, are you twelve?"

Edit 1: And you thought Robert Pattinson was shallow? He got hit by a cab, while he was running from fans. (He's not seriously hurt.) See?

Edit 2: And apparently Google is obsessed too, because this is what came up after the blog post published successfully. Blech!

The Branch and the Clay

(Begin shameless mention of new blog) I recently started another blog, with a more serious focus. The Branch and The Clay, a chronicle of my life as a follower of Jesus Christ, named after the comparisons that are made, between us and God. There's no monkeys, there might be some logic, but I'm not sure if flying will come into it. (We now return to the regularly scheduled blogging)

Really, Warner Brothers?!?

My rant in the style of "Really?!? with Seth and Amy" from Saturday Night Live. Be warned that it contains spoilers from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. This is what I've determined from the book and the previews.

Today I found out that the upcoming Warner Brothers film Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince will be rated PG. The last few films have been PG-13. I don't agree. Why, you ask...

Really, Warner Brothers?!? You think that a bridge being destroyed in the first few minutes of a film is family-friendly?

Really?!?

And you know, sending the really-bad-murderous-bad guys to a main character's house to destroy it (which isn't even in the book) is appropriate for children.

Really?!?

You think that a character touching a cursed necklace, flying up in the air, screaming, almost dying, and being in the hospital for weeks is PG?

Really?!?

You think that a lake full of dead bodies, which then become reanimated and try to stop the main characters from proceeding is PG? (not cute zombies either, the Inferi freaked me, a fifteen year old, out when I read the book, it will be scarier visually)

Really?!?

You think that a character consuming poisoned drink and almost dying is PG?

Really?!? Huh.

And a very important character being murdered by a supposed good guy and falling off of a tower is PG?

Really?!?

Plus there's the new angst/romance stuff, and the fact that two characters are practically glued together by the lips. Huh.

So...

Really, Warner Brothers? Really?!?

(Add to that the fact that Warner Brothers won't share their stuff online, they don't have a way to embed video. They don't understand that the internet is probably the fastest and most efficient way to spread media. Grrr. Really, Warner Brothers? You can't play nice with everyone? Really?!?)

Plus, now when I go see it (at midnight, the first showing!), it will be interrupted by little kids crying 'cause they're scared. Grrr.

Pretty Angsty Classic Vampires? or Whatever Happened to Good Books?

A couple of years ago, you could go into a bookstore or a library and find good teen books, books that were past the kid stage and not quite to the adult stage. Not anymore. There some good books, but two kinds of books make up the majority of teen books: the clique novels and the vampire spinoffs.

Clique novels: books about cliques (Never ever would have guessed!), normally revolves around high schoolers at a private school, angst, romance, drama, revenge, fashion, girl hates guy, then falls in love (you get the idea)

Vampire Spinoffs: follow a basic plot, vampire falls in love with human, fueled heavily by the success of Twilight (if you've never heard of Twilight, you were probably living under a rock for the past year) waaaay too many, again, angst and drama.

Though the teen section has been taken over by angsty (yes, I know that's not a word) books, there are still good books to be found. Here are some of my favorites:

Fantasy:

The Princess and the Hound by Mette Ivie Harrison: mixes fantasy with magic, with a tiny bit of romance, mystery, and adventure. (The sequel, The Princess and the Bear came out very recently)

Goose Girl by Shannon Hale: one of my absolute favorites, Princess Academy and Enna Burning are good too.

The Chrestomanci Chronicles by Diana Wynn Jones: written very well, shows the hidden 'magic' side of Europe(like Harry Potter in that respect, but much better)

Science Fiction:

The Dragonriders of Pern by Anne McCaffrey: a very long series, like Eragon, but first and better.

Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card: though it has some language and 'battle simulation' it presents some interesting points to ponder.

The Uglies, The Pretties, The Specials, and The Extras by Scott Westerfield: a post-apocalyptic series, can be a little preachy about what the Rusties (us) did wrong, but pretty good.

Classics:

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen: Read it. There's not much else to say.

Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen: Same here.

David Copperfield by Charles Dickens: And here.

Alice in Wonderland/Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carroll: though they seem like 'kid' books, Lewis infuses them with logic and puzzles, which I didn't notice until I took logic this year.

The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck: yes, it was long, and the authority figures infuriated me in their treatment of the main characters, but it is superbly written.

So, what about you? Do you agree with the way that 'teen' books are changing? Any great books I forgot?

photo of old book, flickr, cc v.max1978

Canada...Caanan...Egypt...Same Difference?

As JBean (my 7 year old sister) and I were listening to the Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat(after watching this, I must add.) the narrator mentioned that Joseph was sent as a slave to Egypt.

JBean:"I thought Joseph already lived in Egypt?"

Me:"No, he lived in Caanan."

JBean:"Canada?"

Me:"No...Caanan...Nevermind."

So...yeah. That's what happens when I get her into Broadway.

I'm bored or The Undead Bookworm

Today, I'm bored. I've read all my library books and practically every other book in the house (except this one, this one and this one cause they're horrible, or so I've heard). So, in between asking to go to the library (which we will later, yay!) and complaining that I'm bored, I've found a new activity, which really bothers my siblings (muahahahahahahaha!) Using my best zombie imitation, I walk around and mutter "Booooooooks" in the same way that a zombie mutters "Braaaaaaaains". It's actually quite entertaining. So...I leave you with that. "Booooooooooooks"